This is a new account because I forgot the password/email to my old one, oops.
Byond Account: Fauxzor55
Character Name(s): Carrie Argotech
Discord Name: fauxzor#8368
Round ID of Ban: 19184
Ban Message (Gyazo/imgur or copy and paste): Ban Appeal Message
State your appeal:
Woo, this one is a bit of a doozy.
I want to first apologize to the players & admins that I said rude things to in deadchat, because that wasn’t cool at all. I know being drunk isn’t an excuse, but it was late, I was intoxicated, and I got really salty. I apologize profusely for making toxic comments about how they handled their respective roles in this situation.
I will try my best to explain what happened from my perspective (particularly because the ban message is kind of long) but I want to be clear that my intention is not to try to excuse my behavior, because I have no excuses. Just many apologies for the feelings I hurt and the time I wasted.
Admin 4 Asked for antag removed but refused to have your antag items deleted because it “would be funnier” to get rid of them yourself
I spawned in as a heretic after forgetting to uncheck antagonists that round, and I asked an admin to make me a normal crewmember again. I didn’t refuse to have the items deleted (in the sense that I wanted to keep them), it just seemed like it was taking too long to do that-- but I agree that I could have let the admins delete them for me. I immediately spaced the items myself. What I meant by “it would be funnier” is that I thought it would create a roleplaying opportunity for security if they found my book since I thought I was objectively “innocent” on account of having my antag status removed. I did not realize that my fingerprints on the book made me valid regardless. I pointedly did not attempt to use them for anything uncouth, or do anything “funny” with them; I truly thought that keeping them would result in more roleplay, not less (or at the very least a “funny” situation, not a deadly one). Again, I spaced them immediately.
Spaced them close enough to the station that security found them, ID’d you, and then arrested and executed you for being a heretic
Yes, this is what happened. It was dumb to do this but I thought that all that would happen would be that I would be brought in for questioning and at worst sent to perma/become borged if for some reason they took it seriously despite the fact that multiple witnesses could testify that I literally never ever left the Cargo Bay and therefore couldn’t have been a violent heretic.
Ock icked to the HoS about your antag status being removed
I tried extremely hard to not “ock ick” to the HoS, but I wasn’t sure what to do in this situation, because from my point of view I literally wasn’t an antagonist anymore. To be clear: I was in-character the entire time I was talking to him, I just had to come up with an “IC” reason why I had the book in the first place even though I was removed “OOC” from being an antagonist. This is an impossible situation for any player and I genuinely tried my best to navigate this while remaining in-character. I do not think it is fair to be judged for “ock ick” in this instance because there was truly nothing else I could do but submit to be executed for something I explicitly did not do (be a heretic). I was peacefully complaint and cooperative through the entire arrest/detention/interrogation process.
I had done nothing but do my job in the Cargo Bay for the last hour before all that happened, and had all but forgotten about the book at that point, so I was kind of scrambling to justify to security in-character what the deal with the book was while trying to take into account it was (to me) an OOC issue. I admit that I could have been more tactful in how I phrased the situation to the HoS – I think I mentioned that he should “ask the gods about it” or something along those lines – but I really did try very hard to stay in character the entire time, even when I personally believed the entire circumstance to be a misunderstanding between security and the admins and thus fundamentally out of character.
I know am guilty of everything else about this ban, just not this part. I was roleplaying from start to finish and I had zero intentions of ever bridging the gap between IC and OOC until I was about to be executed for (from my perspective) no reason. Even then I took it to adminhelp instead of using OOC in IC like I am accused of doing.
Either way, in the end I was wrong, and I recognize that the proper move here would’ve been for me to shut up and take my lumps and throw my stuff away better next time, but…
and then ahelped 3 times when your ticket complaining that the HoS was executing you was marked IC
…I was confused and upset how this was an IC issue, since I asked the admins OOC to make me a regular crew member again. I got salty in the ahelp chat and I apologize for that. I was frustrated because it seemed like I was being punished for giving up my antagonist status by still being treated as an antagonist IC. Admin help seemed to be my only recourse since the HoS went straight for execution with very little roleplaying involved-- but that isn’t an excuse for how I behaved. I was wrong.
When you were finally executed, continued to rant about the issue in dchat
That is what happened, and again, I am sorry. It was not acceptable to say any of the things that I said in dchat, particularly about the HoS that killed me, and the admin that ultimately banned me.
I had an extensive conversation in the Discord dunce room with several admins/contributors about the circumstances surrounding the issue, where I learned I was permabanned. Despite my initial confusion about my permanent ban (which seemed excessive to me at the time), I was cordial and polite after the fact and I recognized that I needed to take a break for a while, so I did. I think I am ready to play the server again after 10 days.
I would be happy to remain off the server for longer than that if it is deemed necessary for me to properly learn my lesson. Mostly I’d just rather not be permabanned because enjoy playing on Fulpstation and TG alternates way too rapidly between “boring” and “insane” for my tastes. I understand how I failed to grasp the situation here and it will not happen again.
There is no excuse for the vitriol I spewed in the admin helps and the dead chat and I once again sincerely apologize for everyone who was involved in this incident. I really do enjoy playing here, and I am normally a very chill player since all I do is play Supply roles, run the bay, and teach new players what to do vis-a-vis learning cargo. I will submit to an antagonist ban for everything except revolutionary (and possibly traitor) if that is what it takes to get unbanned, and I am happy to answer any follow-up questions anyone may have.
I hope that the conversation that I had with the admins in Discord after this happened counts for something because I personally believe all of the relevant issues were addressed at that time. I was told I needed to take a break after this happened, so I did. I’d just like to play Cargo Tech again.
Thank you for your consideration 