How 2 be a good Maint Goblin

Wanna loot maintenance?; Rise on the maint pill consumed leaderboard? That’s easy!
Just follow this three-step guide and you will be a professional maint looter in no time!

jack paramedic< (Is this you? The average maint goblin?)

STEP 1: Having Proper Equipment:
Right, if you want to loot maints quickly and efficiently you will need some equipment:

  • Maintenance access
  • Meson scanner googles
  • Flashlight/Any good light source
  • Tools
  • Fashionable Maint Goblin Clothing

Alright, let me explain why you will need these:

Maintenance Access is what you will need to go through maintenance airlocks, and is not optional unless you hack your way through with tools (Not recommended), rush the HOP line to ask for your maint access (If you don’t have it already), if the HOP is not on his office, PDA him, ask in comms or ask the captain.

Meson scanner googles are extremely useful when traveling through the maze-like maintenance halls, it lets you see the layout of walls, floors, windows, airlocks, grilles, girders and space without any light required! Its like an x-ray but you can’t anything beyond those things mentioned above. You can get them at the cargo/engineering protolathe, find them in maintenance or if you are on icebox you can find them at the middle of the station between some winter coats and shit idk. Bonus points if you get your hands on a Night-Vision Meson googles

Flashlight/Any other good light source is pretty self-explanatory. There are many good options, flashlight/seclites are pretty good but only light up tiles in front of you, hardhats are flashlights that go on your head, things like glowsticks and flares are temporary but light up a 360° area around you, light from a PDA should only be used in emergencies as it is pretty shit.
If you get your hands on night vision equipment you will not need any light at all and if you are a plasmamen you get a free flashlight on your helmet!

Tools, any self-respecting greytider/maint goblin has tools, while optional, they help you access hidden/blocked areas in maintenance, with the help of your meson googles, no hidden maintenance area will be kept unlooted with the help of your trusty blue toolbox.
You can easily find tools in the primary tool storage or in the auxiliary tool storage if you have the maintenance access to access it, using the YouTool vendor is not recommended as its tools are very overpriced, the autolathe from cargo can print any tools you want if you ask nicely and you can find tools in maintenance with consistency. Screwdriver, wirecutter, wrench, welding tool, crowbar, multitool, chuck em all in a box/toolbelt/toolbox!

Fashionable Maint Goblin Clothing, a must-have for any professional maintenance looter, usually a grey jumpsuit/gas mask does the job (Although a gasmask will limit your field of vision),
but the choice of wear is up to you. Remember, you must dress for success!

Ok, now that you have your NT-standard Maint looter gear, we must move on to:

STEP 2: The lootening

This step is pretty simple, just OPEN EVERY SINGLE LOCKER/CRATE YOU FIND IN EVERY NOOK AND CRANNY OF EVERY SINGLE TILE OF MAINTENANCE and store the juicy loot you find on your bag, umm but if you truly want to be a professional maint looter you gotta learn how to properly do those things, i guess?

Anyways, as mentioned above you should open and fully inspect every single container everywhere, that means crates, lockers, bags, boxes, wallets, etc. You can find anything and everything, it all depends on your luck and you should use your own judgement and wisdom on what you will keep for yourself, but i will go through some common maint loot you may find in your journey. Why? Because i can!

  • Maintenance Pills
    I love maintenance pills, eat them immediatly without hesitation or give it to a friend, those can contain ANY chemical in the game (With a few exceptions), it could be anything from water, to an extremely deadly toxin, to something that turns you in a felinid and anything in between, there is a maintenance pill consumed leaderboard if you go on the OOC tab then on achievements.

    < (I am currently at the 13th spot with 59 eaten :sunglasses:)

  • Bodies
    Not quite as great maint pills but common notheless, if it has a soul you should probaly report it to security and/or bring it to medbay.

  • Costumes and fancy clothing
    They are very fun and fashionable and for some reason the mappers choose to shove those everywhere at maintenance.

  • Mouses and snacks
    Every professional maint looter has its own box full of dead/alive mouses and other maintsnacks, you can make mouse kebab with a metal rod and dead mouses if you go on the crafting tab on the left bottom of your screen and go on the “meats” tab. Don’t be afraid to eat things that came from maintenance, they are mostly harmless. Bonus points if you are a lizard or have the deviant tastes quirk!

  • Strange objects
    Umm, i don’t know what these are for, give them to science i guess?

Right, i almost forgot to mention hidden rooms, umm, you have your mesons and tools, right? So, if you manage to find a special room with no clear entrance, you can burst your way through a wall using a welder and a wrench, all you need to do is to click on a wall with a lit welder then wrench the remaining girder, then either drag that loose girder away, screwdrive it or turn it into a false wall by using iron on it!
hidden garden in icebox < (An example of a hidden room, this one is a hidden garden in icebox)

You should have a lot of maint loot by now, but how and where do your store it? Well, managing your inventory is a essencial part of maintenance looting, but first, let me introduce you to item-sizes: You can examine an item to determine its sixe, Tiny-sized items are things like pens, papers, epipens, IDs, cigs, syringes and etc. You can fit a total of 21 tiny-sized items in an empty backpack. Small-sized items are slighty bigger and very common, and you can fit a total of 14 small-sized items in an normal empty backpack. Normal-sized items are things like boxes, stun batons, shoes, jumpsuits, gas masks and etc. These are the biggest things you can fit in a normal backpack and you can only fit a total of 7 of them in a empty one. Bulky-sized items and above are things like backpacks, baseball bats, stun prods, toolboxes and etc. You can’t fit those in a normal bag, they are too big! Anyways, DID I ALREADY TELL YOU ABOUT BOXES YET?:

  • Boxes, they are a MUST-HAVE, boxes are a normal-sized item that can fit 7 small/tiny items, you can 7 boxes in your bag, that means you can fit a total of 49 (or 7²) small/tiny items in your bag by the use of boxes.
    example of a box in maints< (Nice example of a box in maintenance, really cool i know)
    You can find them in maintenance, make them with cardboard and dissasemble them when not needed if they are empty (Turning them back into cardboard).

  • Backpacks, satchels and duffelbags, we already talked about backpacks, satchels are just backpacks but more stylish but DUFFELBAGS can fit a tad more items than normal bags, they come at a considerable speed penalty when using it on your back tho, but you can still use them on your hand at no speed penalty, beware tho, it only takes a single slip and the clown may easily steal your shitty duffelbag full of maint loot!

  • Toolboxes and Briefcases, they are both bulky, can’t fit on your back and work as storage items. Toolboxes are classic and can store 7 small/tiny items just like boxes, they are stylish and a great robusting tool, they come in many colors as Red, Blue, Yellow and GREEN.
    Briefcases are fancier, less robust as a weapon but can fit a total of 7 normal/small/tiny-sized items, very useful!

  • Bags of holding, very rare, only obtanaible through science using lots of research magicks and bluespace anomalies (or just via admin bullshit), they can fit bulky-sized items and fit on your back, very very very useful and powerful, but you will likely never get to use them, haha!

  • Smuggler satchels, they are a mix between boxes and bags, they are a normal-sized item, you can use it to store other normal sized items inside of it! You can’t quite fit 7 normal sized items inside of it or normal-sized storage items either, but its a considerable upgrade to boxes notheless! You can only find them if you have an active t-ray scanner on hand/pocket and manage to spot one below a floor tile, once you do you can crowbar it out and enjoy it
    example of a smuggler satchel < (Example of smuggler satchel in bridge)
    (or you can buy them from an tator uplink for 1 TC). Or you can use them to stash items, SPEAKING OF STASHING:

Do you have too many barely useful items on you? Don’t worry, there is a little trick called stashing! You can easily stash items on personal lockers found in dorms/locker rooms, barely anyone checks those but if you want to be a little more professional and cool you can use a hidden room in maintenance as your stash/base of operations, use your mesons to scout out a nice room, make sure its hidden, then put one of your locked personal lockers from dorms, throw in a few racks, crates and etc. and bam! Fancy stash room.
Dump whatever items you are not going to use right now in the stash and never worry about futile things as “Using your own judgement and wisdom on what you will keep for yourself” and feel free to grab litteraly any item you find and stash it!

Anyways umm… moving on!

STEP 3: Profit

Theoretically, the lootening should never end until every single tile is completely looted.
But you can’t loot if you are dead can you? Enabling suit sensors can save/end your life while in the maint tunnels, it gives away your exact position and health status to medical perssonel, this can be used to save you if you die, or to do the opposite.

Anyways, survival is a crucial part of maint looting, in your adventures you may find very suspicious and dangerous individuals and things, those include but are not limited to:

  • Bloodsuckers
  • Tator tots and their contraband
  • Heretics and their runes
  • Corpses and blood
  • Enemy Maint goblins trying to steal your maint pills
  • A clown with a fireaxe
  • Some buckethead in a redshirt and black armor vest with a stun batong out
  • Weird cosplayers obssesed with their Nar-Sie waifu

All of these things are not uncommon when maint looting, you should report these things to security and/or stay away from that area entirely. Never engage any evil spessmen in combat unless its on self-defense. Remember, unless you are extremely robust and/or they are extremely stupid, they almost always way more powerful and dangerous than you, unless you are a security officer, stay away!

im ling < (Don’t be this engineer)

But, if you do unfortunately engage in combat with any wrong doer, don’t be afraid to run away, block their path with crates and other obstacles, throw floor tiles and other things at them, weld their face, toolbox their skull until they go horizontal, slip em, bear trap them, scream into comms, shove em, grab them by the neck, punch them in the face like a true man, challenge them to a fair toolboxing match, and the list goes on, just be creative when making valid spessmen go horizontal?? idk lol

Anyways, after you survived all of that and looted all of maints, you have one last thing you can do, that is: “Being useful for the station”, shocking i know. You see, there are many things in maintenance that can be suprisingly useful for your fellow non-maint goblin crew, as previously mentioned, there are strange objects that are useful for sciencemen, special maint seeds like kronkus and odious spore balls that can be ““useful”” for botanists, boxes of donk-pockets and surplus dead mouses that can be useful for the chef, maintenance crates and fuel/water tanks that can be sold at cargo (makes QM’s happy), space cleaners and other cleaning supplies for the janitor and etc!

Be creative, maybe open up a Greytide HQ in the old bar, roleplay as walter white from that hit series and make drugs out of ghetto chemistry and shit, make a huge humoungous stash of all the maint loot you can find in a single room for everyone to enjoy, ummm maybe clean and repair maintenance now and then and make it into a slighty nicer place idk lmao

Umm, im too busy farming maint pills for the maint pills consumed leaderboard to write anything even remotely useful in this guide, lol bye

dead husked me


i am 30th place

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Ratio + I’m 28th

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Once U have wasted hundreds of hours you can swap the mesons, flashlight and maint access for welding gear and just do with that. Also, in any sort of fight you wanna be able to turn off all your lights for a massive advantage.

Last time I looked I was 4th/3rd but I haven’t pilled in a couple weeks.

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ratio + im 3rd + didnt read but this guide sucks and not just because it’s telling people to eat my maint pills

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Actually we’re 2nd and 3rd coz aaaaa and kruh are working together I think (dumb cheaters)

why r u using a picture of me + im 2nd + delete this guide the pills are mine

^^^^ this

can you edit me to the be on the leaderboards image

um, i litteraly can’t delete it??

My favorite tool for being a loot goblin: LARGE BOX

massive amount of storage and a great tool for self defense in the tight halls. Blocks projectiles and when they try and open it they slip on the soap hidden under my pile of dirty syringes and broken booze bottles. Boom now you have space aids and a drunken hobo strangling you.

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i am now 26th place can you update this?