hey so,
Let first start this with a disclaimer, I am not trying to argue nor complain nor bitch, just offering my thoughts.
recently, I got bwoinked as a scientist t for making spiders and not having dagd or hack the shuttle,
it was justified, as they made chaos. but here’s the thing, I made them at the end of the round, when the shuttle was already called, thinking I would used them to break into shit and steal stuff, I quickly realized I can’t speak spider, and had no way of controlling them. summed up: I’m a dumbass and I fucked up. but here’s the thing. I like crazy plans, I like doing silly things, and no I don’t wanna grief or ruin rounds, and I’m sorry I make mistakes, and I misthink things through. just the other day I had a crazy idea to make a sleeping virus as a vampire and use it to help make thralls. I made it non lethal, and only trans by touch. I left viro unbroken for it to be cured even, and it was in under 10 mins. But I got bwoinked for that as well. later that round I got badowked for killing after round end, and killing someone by taking blood. I just feel, like the fear of making mistakes is heavy on me every time I play, why try something that might be a challenge, or need critical thinking, even when trying to make it not game ruining comes foremost to my mind, when it might result in just getting punished.
and that’s not to say I didn’t deserve bwoink in every case, Like I said, I make mistakes, Im a bit of dummy and I should ask the admins more often if things are okay, they get the final say after all. It’s just my admin notes make me out to be awful player… I’m a lier, a griefer, I ignore warnings, I should know better…
I love this game, I love playing on this server. I love seeing other people have fun rounds. I don’t want to grief, and I don’t want to make a bad impression. but getting bwoinked for using my bible on crit people with suspicion that I’m killing them makes me feel like its too late for that.
I feel, as though… I have to apologize. I’m sorry guys :/